Modern Lessons From Arranged Marriages

Posted by Kendall Harmon

Arranged marriages can work “because they remove so much of the anxiety about ‘is this the right person?’ ” said Brian J. Willoughby, an assistant professor in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University. “Arranged marriages start cold and heat up and boil over time as the couple grows. Nonarranged marriages are expected to start out boiling hot but many eventually find that this heat dissipates and we’re left with a relationship that’s cold.”

He also credited supportive parents.

“Whether it be financial support for weddings, schooling or housing, or emotional support for either partner, parents provide valuable resources for couples as they navigate the marital transition,” Dr. Willoughby said

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Filed under: * Culture-WatchChildrenGlobalizationHistoryMarriage & FamilyPsychologySociology* TheologyAnthropologyEthics / Moral Theology

Posted February 7, 2013 at 6:00 am [Printer Friendly] [Print w/ comments]

1. C. Wingate wrote:

Readers would do well to read the comments to this article for a very large dose of salt. And surely anyone has to wonder at the criteria for a fiancee who “the woman must be beautiful, have an Ivy League education, come from a good family whose members are also educated, and have professional goals similar to their son”: it sounds as though the parental standards are strikingly superficial, even mercenary.

February 7, 3:24 pm | [comment link]
2. Teatime2 wrote:

My goodness, is the everyone must be married brigade now resorting to pushing arranged marriages? Sigh ..

Making it mostly about the parents, their values, and their emphasis on income, occupation and status makes marriage primarily a financial agreement. Is it any surprise that the examples and anecdotes are mostly Asian? Caste system, anyone?

Honestly, it IS all right to be single! There’s no need to beg a contract within a lower caste if you’re not a respected oncologist who plays the cello, loves animals, has a second home in Europe and has movie star good looks.

February 8, 4:16 am | [comment link]
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