Do Not Take Yourself too Seriously Dept.—How many Anglicans does it take to change a light bulb?

Posted by Kendall Harmon

Here are five versions, blog readers are challenged to share others they know or come up with their own additional suggestions--KSH.
How many Anglicans does it take to change a light bulb?
Fourteen; one to change it and 13 to ask “what is change?”

How many Anglicans does it take to change a light bulb?
A whole Synod: one to change the bulb and the rest to debate it until the room spins.

How many Anglicans does it take to change a light bulb?A whole congregation: One to call an electrician, the rest to talk about how much better candles used to be.

How many Anglicans does it take to change a light bulb? Five: One to screw in the bulb and four to form a committee to preserve the old one.

How many Anglicans does it take to change a light bulb? The old one is quite good enough for us and there is no need to follow worldly trends and change it.

--The Diocese in Europe (of the Church of England)

Filed under: * Anglican - Episcopal* General InterestHumor / Trivia

Posted July 21, 2013 at 7:42 am [Printer Friendly] [Print w/ comments]

1. KevinBabb wrote:

Change??! My grandmother donated that light bulb!!!

July 21, 4:30 pm | [comment link]
2. David Keller wrote:

Three—one to hold the ladder, one to change the lightbulb and one to mix the Martinis.

July 21, 5:58 pm | [comment link]
3. Robert Atkins wrote:


Are you sure?

I thought it was conventional wisdom that when two or Three Anglicans are present, there is always a Fifth…

July 21, 7:47 pm | [comment link]
4. rwkachur wrote:

Well, first there needs to be a committee.  We can’t just choose any light bulb.  Does the bulb fit with the Millenium Development Goals?  To discuss these issues the committee determined there needs to be a conference, in some place…pleasant but politically respectable - $750,000 USD should cover the tab.  Costa Rica would do nicely.  Once at the conference, we must show our openness by letting the old-incandescent faction say their piece, but fear not, the committee will be properly balanced to achieve the required result.  Now, in principal we agree that the light bulb itself should be installed by a union electrician, but given the current tight finances because of recalcitrant giving on the part of the incandescent-wing of the church we will have to hire a non-union person to install the light but we can make sure our consciences are assuaged by guaranteeing that said person is an undocumented immigrant.  Mission accomplished.

July 21, 8:57 pm | [comment link]
5. Scatcatpdx wrote:

Three- one to change one to mix the drinks and one to complain the old light bulb is much better*. 

*especially in the US if light bulb is model 1979

July 21, 11:05 pm | [comment link]
6. Adam 12 wrote:

None…we pay people to do that…

July 22, 9:22 am | [comment link]
7. New Reformation Advocate wrote:

Kevin (#1),
Your version is my alltime favorite.  One very traditional parish I once briefly served actually displayed with pride a cartoon with that hilarious caption on the buttetin board in the parish hall.  It was a strictly Rite I parish, that still had the 1940 Hymnal in the pews along with the 1982 version because they used both.  It was an Anglo-Catholic parish, and I used to joke when inviting people to come and check it out that “It’s like a free trip back into the Middle Ages every Sunday.”

There’s a reason why such stereotypical jokes exist.

David Handy+

July 22, 11:34 am | [comment link]
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